QUESTIONS TO ASK YOUR RELATIVES ABOUT RELIGION AND SPIRITUALITY

I recall that my dad used to advised that, when visiting, to talk about the weather.  What he meant was that controversial subjects were to be avoided.  Politics...  Religion... Perhaps knowing that these subjects will spark debate - or worse, arguments - during a family get together is trouble and, sure, I wouldn't want you to create an uncomfortable situation at a gathering. But then he was of the Silent Generation, and the Silent Generation wasn't talking about a whole lot.  

Things have changed, at least in some places and sometimes.

I can say that it came as a relief to learn that my ancestors were of various Christian denominations, which I wouldn't have suspected based on my upbringing. In my heritage - and I only know this because of genealogy research I have Roman Catholics, Greek Catholics, Reform Protestants (Calvinists), Lutherans, and also, it seems - some would say this doesn't fit the religion category - a Mason.

And so maybe getting a conversation going with relatives about ancestral religious or spiritual beliefs starts with past rather than the present.

It could be that you can't find what you need in the church records of the assumed Faith because those ancestors were converts or belonged to another religion.  And got buried in a churchyard or Faith based cemetery. 

And it seems like everyone in past generations belonged to some church or temple or organization ...

QUESTIONS

Was John baptized?  Who were his godparents?

Did he take part in rituals such as Communion, Confirmation?

Did John belong to a church as a teenager, as an adult?  

Did he sing in a choir?  

Did he do volunteer work for the church? 

Was he devout?  Or Religious. (Did he consider becoming a priest or minister or monk?)

Did he change religions? If so, why and when?  (Some families simply went to the closest church, wherever they moved to. Perhaps John was in a cult?) 

Did he get married in a church? How was it decided where he would marry?

Did he have children? Were they raised in a religion?  (This might bring up some different responses if the marriage was a "mixed marriage."  For instance, perhaps the children were allowed to join a different church or make up their own minds about spirituality as adults, 

Where is he buried? (Is this a Faith based cemetery?) or was he cremated?  Where are his ashes?

These questions can always spark a departure in the conversation. Back when I took Anthropology 101, it was noted that the definition of religion was "a way of life." Life in America has changed. Regular attendance at church services was normal for many people prior to the changes of the 1960's. Today many have decided that church is not for them.  As genealogists, we are looking for church records in addition to or instead of civil records to find our ancestors.

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SOME FAMILY: HOW HISTORICAL GENETICISTS and MORMON GENEALOGISTS DIFFER : BOOK EXCERPT

SOME FAMILY

THE MORMONS and HOW HUMANITY KEEPS TRACK OF ITSELF

by Donald Harman Akenson  C 2007

Published by McGill-Queen's University Press - Montreal and Kingston

Pages13-14  Excerpt

"Where historical geneticist and Mormon genealogists completely lose touch with each other is in their notion of who are First Parents were and how we find them.  IN this regard, historical geneticists are humble, in the sense that they were aware that they are making a set of approximations and that they will never have a final answer. ... In contrast, the Mormons are confident to the point of arrogance (quiet arrogance, but never the less cocksure).  They know that humanity came into existence as described in the Book of Genesis in the Hebrew scriptures.  This was in the year 4004BCE, or thereabouts, according to the now-classical chronology of Archbiship James Ussher, the seventeenth century Church of Ireland archbishop of Armagh...

Page 88

...The conflicting forces are th4e Mormons, genealogists in general, historical geneticists, historical demographers, and anthropologists.  (I am lumping together anthropologists, ethnographers, and ethnologists, while being fully aware that over the generations they have fought with each other over the job specifications for each category.)  All the various forces are produced by individuals who are good-faith practitioners of their own discipline or sub-field within their discipline.  but if they cannot agree on something so basic as what to call the human adult  pair bond- then we are in trouble let alone when they begin developing their own terms for various family members and for generational interconnections.

...the Mormon use of "pedigree" to refer to human genealogical lines is to be voided.  The demographers, geneticists, and anthropologists are here correct: thoroughbred horses and show dogs have pedigrees,  but humans are not the product of controlled breeding programs.  In human society we have "lines: or "lineages,"  never pedigrees.

A set of words that also is to be avoided, except under very narrow circumstances, is "patriarchal" and "matriarchal".  These are perfectly good words, but not here.  They carry connotations of power relationships that can be confusing...

Page 110

If you enter any aspect of the Mormon genealogical system - from blank genealogy forms to computer-generated lineages - you will discover that it runs on the Standard Double system.  Is this ethnocentric imperialism?  Probably, but there is a potential intellectual justif8ication for the practice.  This is the very clear argument that all human beings have biological mother and a biological father and that, therefore, humans should be traced in the same way traces the breed roots of Secretariat or Red Rum.  .... one cannot retroactively impose the Standard Double system on cultures that did not employ it.

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SOME FAMILY : DONALD HARMAN AKENSON LOOKS AT WAYS OF DEFINING FAMILY and LATTER DAY SAINTS GENEALOGY OBSESSION

SOME FAMILY

THE MORMONS and HOW HUMANITY KEEPS TRACK OF ITSELF

by Donald Harman Akenson  C 2007

Published by McGill-Queen's University Press - Montreal and Kingston

A fascinating book which asks the question, is the Latter Day Saint's religious view of family that so inspires their genealogical research and world effort to collect data on humans who once lived.

As a genealogist, I've become aware that some of the records one find have been previously submitted by Latter Day Saints have not been proofed, that there are errors. However, as I understand it, most people only go back to their great grandparents, and frankly, for most people going back much further can be extremely taxing if not impossible, depending on exactly where those people were living.  (For instance if your heritage is from Jewish London you may be able to go much further back.  If your ancestry is English or German you may also be able to go much further back.)

So here are some excerpts from this boom that I found quite telling.

page 7-8) On the dimensions of the collective project LDS members are working on (For which they have already collected 2 billion names.)

"The world records for fecundity are the more than 1,400 progeny sired by Moulay Ismail, an eighteenth-century emperor of Morocco, and on the female side, the 69 children of Fedora Vassilyex, an eighteenth century Russian woman.)  This if the Mormons are going to make a world pedigree, it would seem they have their work cut out for them....What saves their task from being completely inconceivable is the simple fact that human beings interbreed quite promiscuously.  Not just third cousins, or second, but first cousins, uncles and nieces, brothers and sisters, fathers and daughters, nephews and aunts, wives and brothers in law, and on and on.  Most of the closest inbreeding are covered up by social convention and by skilled lying.  Unless your parents come from totally separate populations (say from Africa and from China), you would not have to go back many generations to find some of your mother's people procreating with your father's - would not, that is, if the records were compete and accurate, which they are not.... Whether or not one likes this basic fact of frequent human inbreeding, it provides a valuable set of advantages for genealogists and geneticists.  It means, first, that nay individual will have a lot fewer distinct genealogical lines to trace than if there had been no inbreeding.... the limited original population from which we all stem means that we are all interrelated;  and, if there were a full genealogy of every human being, we would discover that not only are we all related, but that our ancestors intersected with each other several times in a great genetic tangle.

More excerpts coming...

By the way,  I think most genealogists know this.  After all this is what is behind all the web sites you see in which some celebrity is connected through some line (could be one of 64 or more) to a royal personage.

MEMORIES OF HEAVEN ; CHILDREN's ASTOUNDING RECOLLECTIONS OF THE TIME BEFORE THEY CAME TO EARTH : Ancestry Worship Geneaology Book Review

MEMORIES OF HEAVEN ; CHILDREN's ASTOUNDING RECOLLECTIONS OF THE TIME BEFORE THEY CAME TO EARTH

by Dr. Wayne W. Dyer and Dee Garnes

(note: Dr. Dyer died a while back but this book was something that he and Dee Garnes were working on before that.  It is a collection of stories sent by parents with some personal introductions by Dyer.)

This book is a lot about angels, of the Christianity type, and there is barely any negativity in it, which means that there is no mention of hell, purgatory, or ghosts who are earthbound, but a lot about ancestors who have passed away who are watching over the child or the family, who the child thinks of as an angel. 

As the subtitle suggests these accounts are about children who remember before they came to earth, and so there is mention of previous lives. Researchers working on pre-life memories, past life memories, and reincarnation like the testimonials of children, because they are far less likely to be tainted with exposure to informative education via school or exposure to media.  It is understood that their level of child development means they are more innocent, and have no reason to lie. (Though we've all met children who tell one made up story after another.)  So these accounts read simply, and have some parental interpretation involved.  For instance some of these parents are astounded that their child is taking about angels, heaven, the spirit, etc. because they have little to no exposure to religion.  Generally by the age of five most children do not seem to remember the spirit world, heaven, their pre-earthly life, other lives, or their once well known reasons for picking their parents/family, reason for coming to earth, or that they have angels.

What this means is that adjustment to this life comes gradually... and I suspect transition to the next may also come gradually as well.

Among the accounts there are children reporting that their mother's previous miscarriages (one child said he tried to come to her three times before), Children alive who know their mother is pregnant with another child before she does,  children whose invisible playmates are actually relatives and friends who have passed over, children who report having been their mother's mother, and Jesus asking a child to pick parents among many couples.

Interesting and an easy read, you'll only feel challenged if you're sure this life is it.

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CHABAD.org explains about YIZKOR PRAYER and GIVING

"In addition to reciting Yizkor for one's parents, one may recite Yizkor for any Jew who has passed on, including relatives and friends. When reciting Yizkor for more than one person, repeat the Yizkor paragraph each time, and substitute the words "Aböh Mori" (my father), or " Imi Morösi" (my mother), with the appropriate title, as follows: For a Husband: "Ba-ali." Son: "B'ni." Brother: "Öchi ." Uncle: "Dodi." Grandfather: "Z'kainy" . Wife: " Ishti." Daughter: "Biti." Sister: "Achosi." Aunt: "Dodosi." Grandmother: "Z'ken-ti."

Read more by linking the site above!

Our genetic and spiritual ancestors help us with our research quests and, while we follow a linear research path, amazing dreams and synronicities abound.

We explore multicultural ancestry worship and the use of genealogy for past-life verification, as well as practical ways and means to achieve your research goals.

ALL SOULS - CHRISTIAN AND BUDDHIST or HINDU or JEWISH PRAYERS FOR THE DEAD GOLDFISH?

...to be released from Purgatory or Bardo to Heaven or Eternal Bliss...

I believe there is an afterlife. I also believe there is an experience best described as reincarnation. I eagerly read about the experiences those who "almost died" come back with. Although the tunnel of light and loving ancestors and friends who have passed on seems to be the most commonly reported experience, I have also read some very dark stories, some intent on converting the reader.

My most favorite reference to the near death experience is from prolific author and psychic, famous through television, Sylvia Browne. Sylvia has such a forthright personality. She tells it as she sees it, even if it's a little ouchy, at first.

OK, Sylvia Browne says that all the PETS you have owned and loved in ALL YOUR INCARNATIONS are also waiting for you when you make it through that tunnel of light to the OTHER SIDE... the very idea makes me smile.

CAN YOU IMAGINE YOUR PET FISH over there swimming, swimming, swimming in the ether? Waiting, waiting, waiting...

You know what? I can't. I am afraid that long ago I accidentally, through ignorance, killed some pet fish! One time I killed three fancy goldfish in their mucky mucky because I had the brilliant idea to put clean fresh water in their bowl! But maybe in eternal bliss they forgive me.

The turtle that never came out of hibernation in our basement: him too?


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